When all is lost
by gERMaNgIrL678
Summary: There's another Plummer child, this is her take on the story and how it affected her and the other family members. Shane/OC
1. Prolouge

Disclaimer: I DO NOT own the Pacifier or it's characters or it's plot though I do wish I owned a certain someone :p I own my O

Disclaimer: I DO NOT own the Pacifier or it's characters or it's plot though I do wish I owned a certain someone :p I own my OC's and my ideas for this fanfic. My first fic for this movie so take it easy on me !! Flamers I know you're out there, I'll ignore you but constructive criticism is welcomed. Always looking forward to Reviews to know I'm doing a decent job! I hope you enjoy

Alexandria's P.O.V. (She is not a mary sue!! She has issues like all of us, I hope I make this as realistic as possible I'm using part of my experience and some movies!)

Prologue

Everything was way better when dad was around, way simpler. I can remember every detail of the day we found out…

The day we found out he'd been murdered.

3 gunshot wounds, one it the leg, one in the chest and the last in his head. Being woken up at 2:30 in the morning by the sound of a doorbell ringing, Glancing briefly outside my window to see those black and white care whose light were flashing brightly. I heard my mom answers the door before hearing her cry. My stomach dropped, my mouth went dry and I could hear my heart beating loudly. I felt tears prick my eyes and I let them fall freely, I let them take over me.

My FATHER was dead, But I'd already known what had happened since I had been woken up, a knot in my stomach. I cried the rest of the night, replaying memories of hi over and over again trying to convince myself he was alive and well but I still knew tomorrow he wasn't going to be coming home, give me a forehead or tell me how much he loved me.

So I prepared myself for the next morning when my mother told my family the news. Oh GOD!! My family, they'll be so lost, so helpless to this tragedy! At that moment I knew I had to become slightly emotionless, have a hard edge, I was the oldest it was my responsibility to care for my family…wasn't it? I had to try to help do what I could, I can't let my family fall apart!! I have to stay strong even when hey fall.

At 9:30 my mom gathered us around to tell us the news, I didn't cry as I promised myself. I had to stay strong, I let a few tears fall as I hugged my family with my mother and I told one the rest of our family it would be okay. I had never seen my family so torn apart, it hurt just to watch.

I knew things wouldn't be okay but I said it for their sake only. A half of me was missing. Ever since I was born my father and I have a had such a deep connection, we were so in tuned so one another, It was powerful and I love it, but now that was gone, I felt so lost and helpless but I didn't show it.

Keeping my emotions in check was so difficult, I had to stay strong take my mind off dad. I silently cried myself to night for a while but I mainly had the worst nightmares where I woke up screaming, it happened almost every night.

Around this time Zoe started hating me for keeping my emotions in check, we used to have a terrific relationship like best friends but she changed. My younger blonde 17 year old sister hated me now. Seth my 15 year old brother with mousy brown hair understood and respected my decision as did my blonde mother. My annoying brunette 11 year old sister respected my choice but pushed to know why I wasn't sad. All Peter knew was that daddy was gone and Tyler had no idea what was going on.

I've been helping my mother 24/7 with Peter and Lulu and a bit with Tyler, When I had time I talked with Seth, but my mom mainly handled Tyler, Zoe and Seth she relied on me to take care of Peter and Lulu. Ever since our nanny quit I had to help out so much.

I've barely been able to do what I wanted or needed to. Honestly everyday since dad I've been dying a little each day struggling to do what was the right thing, stay strong and be there for my family.

In the end it'd probably end up killing me…


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **It's on the first page!!

Sorry it took so LONG to Update. Enjoy, but warning, very intense sequence!!

**Yudr**: Thanks for the review! I'll defiantly work on my grammar, Thank you very much for the constructive criticism

**Smallncrazy91**: This is the second chapter ain't it? Thanks for being supportive!

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**Laminator: **Thank you, AND yes(!) I will rock on!

BlueEyedGunSlinger**: **Here it is, hope your not disappointed!

**TheExplodingKiwi:** Of course I'd never leave you HANGING!! Enjoy kiwi

**Thank you to all my chapter one reviewers!!**

Chapter 1

2 months later

"Alex!!" I heard a faint voice call but I ignored it, enjoying the feeling of the warm water hitting my back. I ran my fingers though my seal brown hair (A.N. look on Google), which looked peculiar due to the white suds covering most of it.

I then heard some banging on the bathroom door, "Alexandria!" I heard my mother yell through the door.

"What!?" I yelled back, unhappy someone had interrupted my pleasant shower.

"I need to talk to you and your siblings downstairs", she replied before I heard her walk off. I sighed miserably before rinsing my hair and turning off the showerhead. I stepped out of the shower before toweling my hair and slipping some clothes on.

I hurried downstairs and I saw my mother standing there impatient with the rest of my family. My sister glared at me from her seat tossing her strait blonde hair over her shoulder while Seth sent me a few sympathetic glances.

"Now that everyone is here…" my mother started looking pointedly at me, I shrugged it off "…I would like to tell you some news". I immediately wondered what she had to say.

"Are you dating someone, cause mom we already talked about that, we all agreed it would be fine…as long as you don't tie the knot for a while…" I was going to keep rambling when my mom cut me off.

"No Honey, it's nothing like that, I wanted to talk to you all to inform you that I will be leaving on a business trip that has to do with your fathers will. While I'm gone though the military has decided to send someone to watch you kids…" Immediately as the words left her mouth the room was filled with noise. Lulu was asking questions about who this person was and if he knew Kung Fu, Zoe was complaining about how we were old enough to take care of ourselves as well as Tyler, Peter ad Lulu. Seth looked annoyed and muttered something about "…stupid military men". I rolled my eyes at their responses before questioning my mother when she was leaving.

"I'm leaving tomorrow afternoon" she replied seeming nervous at what we were going to saw. Again the room exploded into noise. Zoe exclaiming

" What Tomorrow?! What if this army guy is a freak and doesn't let me do what I want?!"

Lulu complaining "Why didn't you tell us earlier?" and Seth grumbling "If things couldn't worse". At that moment Tyler looked around the room confused by all the yelling before opening his great big mouth while his light green eyes filled up with tear before he started wailing. I looked at my mother's distressed face before I ran to pick him up and comfort him. He kicked and screamed a little before eventually settling down.

I looked at my mom waiting for her to reply, " Well I didn't tell you because I only found out about it yesterday. Zoe I'm sure Mr.Wolfe is not a freak, he was actually on the mission to rescue your father..."

My head snapped up and my face paled, all my siblings shifted uncomfortably in their seats and looked mournfully at one another. I cleared my throat slightly, my mother looked up with her blue watery eyes before continuing"…Mr.Wolfe took a bullet for him so I'm positive he is a great man."

I nodded my head slightly trying to look unaffected but I felt sick to my stomach, all my nightmares returning in a flash and I grabbed the crib next to me for support, my knuckles turning white. I squeezed my eyes shut making sure no saw the tears glistening in my forest-green eyes. I kissed Tyler on the top of his head who now gurgled happily up at me before I placed him back into his crib.

"So who is he anyway?" I asked. "Navy Seals officer Shane Wolfe, age uh oh there umm…29 in two months" my mom replied looking up from the sheet she had in her hand.

We all looked at one another before Seth declared he was hungry and he headed towards the kitchen, Zoe to her room and Lulu to the playroom.

My mother looked at me pushing her blonde hair behind her ear. "How are you Alexandria?" She asked softly. I looked at her trying to think of a smart remark but instead managed to say, "How do you think?"

My mom walked over and sat next to me, wrapping her thin arm around my slightly muscular frame. I leaned against her shoulder and breathed deeply. Feeling like a normal teenage girl at that moment with regular teenage problems, but that wasn't so. I felt tears start to well up in my eyes, but I wouldn't let them fall.

"I want to talk to you about tomorrow, I'm sorry for the late notice but I only found out a while ago…" she trailed off, but I nodded and mumbled, "It's okay."

" …Alex, I want you to be kind to Mr. Wolfe, to listen to him, do what he asks, and help him with whatever he needs." Immediately my mind drifted to what my mother implied and I let a little smile grace my face, I was about to comment on that but she continued talking.

"… I haven't left you since your father's death, so they offered to send someone." Again I nodded but I was a little suspicious, she hesitated when she was ending her sentence. I nodded before picking my head up off her shoulder and 

reassured her I would help Mr. Wolfe to the best of my ability. She looked at me her face softening before running her hand through my hair.

"I'm so sorry honey, for the stress I've put on you, for how you've been dealing with all this, I mean the nightmares…" I shifted uncomfortably, tensing; I hated it when my mom talked to me about dad it brought back to many bad memories, which only caused me more pain.

"…You need to look after yourself if you worry too much about us, I…you need to worry about yourself and do what's right for you…" At this point in time I was getting ready to stand up; I couldn't take all this talk.

"Sweetheart if you would just talk to me, I'm positive we could all get through this together as a family, I know how close you and your father were…" I cut her off "Mom, don't you dare talk about what dad and I had because you have no idea what it is and you never will, and we already are a family, we're fine, we're all passing school and everyone is being taken care of here at home!" I said this in a deadly voice and I saw my mother flinch like she'd been burned.

I stormed to my room, but on the way up there I met Zoey she glared at me with her piercing blue eyes. "You know don't flip out at mom just because you can't deal with dad being dead and acting like a retard, you know when someone's conscious but they're not really there, you're like that but with no emotions!" As Zoey said this she waved her hand in front of her face as if I was slow.

Surprisingly, I didn't feel the blow of her words, I just felt exactly like she said, emotionless. I looked at her with dull eyes as if to say 'anything else' she looked taken back before brushing past me muttering "point proven".

I stood there before walking back to my room; I looked around my face blank of any emotion. My room was white with some purple floral designs decorating it, giving it a simple look. I had a Queen sized bed in the middle of my room with checked sheets and a duvet. I walked across my peach colored carpet to sit on my bed. I had a wardrobe opposite my bed full of skinny jeans and tank tops. I had a few landscape paintings, one of which was a sunset on a beach in Morocco. Another one was from Monet. Monet was my dad's favorite Painter…was_ his favorite_. That thought only made me unhappier. I sat on the bed and leaned against the headboard. I looked at the little side table next to me to check the time and it read 4:30. I groaned as Zoey's words repeated in my head "acting like a retard, you know when someone's conscious but they're not really there, you're like that but with no emotions!" I shut my eyes and willed those words away, but they stayed replaying like a broken record. I looked to my right out my window, my desk sat next to my walk in closet.

"…No emotion…" I couldn't stand it her words repeating over and over it my head; I let out a strangled cry. Before letting myself remember the worst nightmare I had, letting it engulf me and making me only think of the pain, that was the only feeling making me human at this point. Of course I felt emotions but sometimes I just shut down, I had been getting better…a little.

FLASHBACK

I see my father standing there, "Alex, Zoey, Seth, Lulu, Peter, Tyler."

He opened up his case only to look at a picture of us, his family.

I was standing there in front of him just smiling.

Then I noticed something, a man was coming up a gun in hand, "DAD!!" I screamed.

He continued talking on his phone "Hi honey it's me…" He had a huge grin on his face,

I called again even louder "DAD WATCH OUT!! DAD, LISTEN TO ME!! LOOK OUT BEHIND YOU!!" He still didn't hear me he just continued talking, I saw the man cock his gun and aim at his leg.

"DAD!!" I screamed, this time I started running, only when I ran I didn't go anywhere, it was if I was running in place. I tried running faster but it did nothing.

That's when I heard it '**BANG!'** I froze, I saw my father fall to his knees, he'd just hung up on the phone, it fell to the sand and he looked up in shock but not at me, past me.

I couldn't help it I fell to my knees "Dad." I sobbed weakly. My father looked around bewildered as to what was happening. Blood was trickling gently out of his mouth as I heard the gun be reloaded.

"No." I croaked and I started crawling to him, this time I was moving forward but still at snail's pace, I tried moving faster but nothing happened. '**BANG!**' I saw my father's body convulse and blood spurt out his chest and drops flew onto my beautiful spotless white dress. His body convulsed bit more before hitting the ground, his rich maroon blood soaking the delicious golden colored sand.

"No…NO!…NOOOO!!" I cried scampering in his direction trying my hardest to move my fastest towards my dying father. The man with the gun was about to shoot again, when a faceless man jumped in front my father getting shot in the side while doing so. He fell to the side with grunt.

The man kicked my father so his chest was facing up. He looked horrible, bloody face and blood drenched clothes he was spluttering, "wh…w…why?" He didn't respond but merely cocked his gun and pointed it at my father's head.

I tried to reach him in time to somehow shield him but I couldn't make it. "Dad, no please, NO!" at this point I was dragging my limp body to my father.

'**BANG!!'**

The shot echoed and I screamed bloody murder, "NOOOOO, NOOOO!" My yells were echoing. Before I knew it, I was next to my father. I could see where the last bullet penetrated his head. I was sobbing and weeping I knew I could cry forever and that's exactly what I planned on doing.

My sobs where mixed with loud yells and cries of despair; I couldn't take it, my heart was being ripped to shreds, my body felt on fire everywhere it was the worst pain I'd ever felt.

I screamed in despair …

END FLASHBACK

I was pulled back to reality when there was a knock on the door; I looked over at the clock and was surprised to see it read 6:00. "Who is it?" I called, nobody responded but he door opened and Seth's head appeared through the crack.

"Time to eat." He said, I nodded and started to get up.

"How are you?" he questioned casually, I looked at him and shrugged my shoulders brushing past him to dinner. It was a relatively quiet except for Zoey complaining about Shane, and Lulu asking a bit more about Mr. Wolfe. I stayed up until 1:00 that morning reading the twilight books and watching Speed with the sexy Keanu Reaves.

That night I slept soundly.

Hope y'all enjoyed, I'm sorry it took so long, I just moved so things have been stressful!

Always looking for CONSTUCTIVE CRITICISM, as well as new ideas.

Shane comes in the next chpater:P

All questions you have will be answered here:P

PLEASE REVIEW, let me know if I'm doing a good job!

Yours truly,

Germangirl678


	3. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer is on the first page people!**

**Uhhh…..**

**Thanks to:**

**BB…what** would I do without you??! MY beta reader and MY BEST FRIEND!!! Thanks so MUCH! I will dedicate this chapter to you…why not? YAY say hi to EVERYONE! Man, grr I wish you were here! Well, it is me :D hahahaha, well I'm happy to know I can affect people with my writing! I know what you mean with the missing! Anywho, I know evanescence is…*le sigh* no question best music EVER!:D

Miss you so MUCH!

3 you forever always miss you!

**BlueEyedGunSlinger:** Thanks and I know, they really are awful and oh em gee here's a spoiler: THEY GET WORSE!!! I know, that's the worst in the world! But nope I ain't gonna tell you :D I'm evil I know!

**Smallncrazy91: **Thanks AGAIN for the review! And here you go my next chapter!

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**ALL YOU PEOPLE WHO SENT ME PRIVATE MESSAGES AND HAVE ADDED ME UNDER ALERTS AND JUST YOU GUYS WHO'VE READ IT AND ENJOY IT! THANK YOU SO MUCH! IT MEANS SO MUCH, CAUSE I'M JUST DOING WHAT I LOVE AND PEOPLE ENJOY IT!**

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**SO…people this chapter is dedicated to BitterBeginnings…aka my BFF (..well one of them :D)**

**CHAPTER 2**

I awoke the next morning tired, but pleased that I did not have to wake up screaming. I moaned and ran my hands through my short messy hair before rolling over to look at the clock, which flashed 12:30 in bright red numbers.

"Shit." I thought, "That navy guy will be here any second, and Emma was supposed to come over sometime today." I rolled out of my cozy bed and walked out into the hallway. Immediately I was assaulted with Lulu's piercing scream, I grabbed my ears; loud noises in the morning were not a good thing.

"Morning freak." Zoe muttered as she roughly bumped into me before yelling "Watch where you're going…" I glared at her retreating back before I heard my mom yell

"Alex honey, come here please…"

I groaned again, " Will you guys keep it down! I just woke up and already you guys gave me a fucking headache!"

"Alexandria! Do not use that language in my house." Mom yelled angrily up the stairway.

Again I winced before trudging down the stairs, I could hear my mother talking to someone.

"…and this is my oldest daughter Alexandria, sorry about earlier she's not…not a morning person."

I heard a deep male voice grunt a reply, which I couldn't make out. When they finally came into view I froze, the man in front of me was bald, 6'1, and was very, very muscular. He had brown eyes and was currently wearing a white t-shirt that clung to his muscular form and tan colored cargo pants.

I glanced down at what I was wearing and blushed. I was wearing a belly top with a sports bra and a pair of shorts that came to my knees but clung to my butt.

"Kids, this is Mr. Shane Wolfe, Mr. Wolfe…" Shane cut her off and whispered something to her. "…Okay, then Shane as I said before these are my children."

Shane scanned us head to toe, being careful not to miss out any details. When he finally reached me he looked half-improvingly, half-amused. Our eyes met for a second and time stopped all together, I felt a chill run up my body and I averted my gaze immediately.

"Okay, kids let me talk to Shane in the kitchen." Mom said before everyone scattered off doing his or her morning rituals. I trotted down the stairs calling "Hey Mom…" I ran to catch up with her. Shane and my mom turned around, I immediately felt intimidated by his height and stature.

I felt myself blushing a bright tomato red and started talking. "Is it still okay if Emma comes over so we could do homework and hang out?"

"You would have to ask Shane if that was okay." My mother replied.

I turned to Shane and asked "Uhh…Shane, Mr. Wolfe…" I grinned as I remembered the game we used to play called Mr. Wolf, when I was younger. He stared at me as if to say 'continue'.

"…sorry, ummm…is it okay if my friend comes over to hang out for a bit?" I questioned meekly.

"I don't see why not, as long as it doesn't cause any trouble." It was the first time I'd heard Shane speak, and I prayed to god it wouldn't be the last. His voice was deep and gravely, it almost made me shiver with pleasure, almost. I nodded mutely, fearing that if I spoke I would only embarrass myself.

I turned around when my mom called to me "Honey…" My mother called. "Yea?" I questioned spinning around

"You might want to change into something a little less…" She paused looking for a word

"Skanky?" I suggested grinning broadly; it also brought a small smile to Shane's lips.

My mom laughed, "I was going to say revealing but skanky works as well. We grinned at one another before I asked my mom when she was leaving.

"I'll be leaving in approximately half-an hour," She said.

I nodded before saying, "Well I'm gonna jump in the shower real quick and get ready for Emma to come over." Emma is my best and only real friend I have, sure I have acquaintances NOT including my ex-boyfriend Richard.

My mom nodded while Shane merely observed the both of us. I started to head off while I heard a murmur of noise behind me signaling that Shane and my mother had started talking.

"Honey, once I leave could you please give Shane a tour of the house, we're going to be discussing some things for a while, okay?" My mom called to me.

I turned around and started walking backwards towards the stairs before I nodded and gave Shane a small smile. I faced front before hopping up the stairs 3 at a time. While I was going up I felt a shiver go up my spine, someone was watching me. I glanced briefly behind me to where my mother and Shane were standing and our eyes met for not even a millisecond. I shook my head questioning if it had actually happened before heading towards the bathroom. Once in the shower I breathed deeply in relief. I ran my hands through short my hair, loving the feel of the water running through it.

I then began thinking about how horrible it will be without my mother being here. 'Oh god, first time without mom being here, how am I supposed to do anything?! I can hardly manage when mom is here but now she's gone, triple the work! Not to mention I have an extremely attractive babysitter! But this will never work, I cant even manage to take care of myself!!!'

I sighed in defeat; my little mental argument was getting me nowhere. I finished up my shower relatively quickly before heading to my room to get dressed. I pulled on a pair of navy blue skinny jeans and a red strapless top with black short sleeves attached to it.

"Alex, mom's leaving!" I heard Seth yell through the door.

"Coming." I yelled, I observed my choice of outfit one last time before heading out my safe haven.

**Hope Y'all enjoyed and again I do apologize for it taking such a long time!**

**3 BB and laura!**


	4. Chapter 3

**BlueEyedGunSlinger- **I know it was short! That's why I'm doing this so it's longer and hopefully good! Oh yea, I would give...a lot to have him as my babysitter...the things I would do :P

**Nebulalightspeed-** Thanks I'm glad you enjoyed!

**Smallncrazy91- **Thanks for being such a consistent reviewer! It really helps!

**BitterBeginnings- **Oh my love!!! YAY, I know I was so excited writing this one chapter because it had your favorite part!! It made me so happy :D

I LOVE YOU!!! 3

**Miss-Charisma-Cullen-** Thank you so much for your support MissCC. My beta really is great and so are all my awesome reviewers!! Laura is one of my best friends who I love dearly :]

**aandm18- **Yes!!! Thank you, I'm so happy you liked it! This is great, I'm definitely trying to make this as realistic as possible and if it ever changes from being that I look to you guys to tell me that so I can fix it and make it better! Thanks so much!

**xxGrimmxx-** hahaha, I very much enjoyed your review and I plan on it! I lost my journal for a while but I just found it!

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**Mickey-Moo-** yess!!!! I totally agree Shane is a sex god ;] haha, here is the next chapter, hope to hear from you again, awesome sn btw!

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**Jasper's Woman- **I definitely will continue, don't worry! :]

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**Lupin's Woman NO touchy-** Here ya go Lupin's woman :D hope you enjoy!

**Hope you guys like this and I'm sorry the other chapter was so short!!! **

**Loving the reviews and thanks for all your support!**

**Chapter 3**

I burst through my door and ran down the stairs and saw my mom hugging everyone goodbye. She had tears in her eyes and she was kissing each of them on the crown of their heads.

I came to the bottom and she engulfed me in a bear hug, that was the only thing I did.

"Oh Alex, what would I do without you?" my mother said tucking my hair behind my ear. I stayed still, I knew if I relaxed I would end up a sobbing heap on the ground.

"Take care of yourself," She stated. "I will, after the family is taken care of". I told her, giving her a meek smile.

She sighed again "Be careful though." "Be careful about what?" I questioned curiously.

"Don't forget yourself after all this time," She said and before I ask her more about what she meant but she cut me off.

" I have to get going, be kind to Shane and take care of yourself, I promise to back as soon as possible...I love you." She kissed my forehead before she reached for her bag.

Out of nowhere Shane appeared and grabbed it "Let me get that for you Mrs. Plumber" He said gruffly

My mom looked pleasantly surprised before stating "Please as I said before call me Julie." "Alright, Julie" Shane stated before carrying the case to the taxi.

Mom turned around again and gave us all quick hugs "I love you guys so much, your father would be so proud of you all" She stated. We all smiled at that, but I felt my smile was more like a grimace. Shane came and stood beside me and for some odd reason I felt more relaxed.

My mother waved at us all yelling 'I love you' out of the taxi window. I raised my arm and flicked my wrist in a small wave. We stood there until the taxi was out of sight. I breathed in deeply praying that this wouldn't be the last time we saw her. While breathing in I caught a whiff of a smell that was so masculine and musty I felt slightly disorientated.

I glanced to my right and saw Shane standing still observing his surroundings before he looked down at me, I didn't look away which seemed to surprise him but as he kept staring at me it was a penetrating and deep stare and I felt he could see through me and the face I put up, my façade. I felt so open and exposed in those moments, it seemed as if the brick wall I'd been building up was slowly being taken down as he continued to stare at me.

Then Peter started crying, he ran to me, "Alex! I want mommy!" I tapined me juts to see him so upset, everyone was staring at me to see what I was going to, what I would do to me the situation better.

Bent down grabbed Peter before heaving him up so he was straddling my hips. "Peter, mommy went away, but she'll be back soon, okay Peter Panda? She'll be back soon," I told him. He stuck his thumb in his mouth before nodding and hugging me his head resting on my chest; his tears subsiding considerably. I rocked my hips back and forth in a swaying motion at the same time I stroked hair and gave him a kiss on the crown of his head.

"Okay listen up!" Shane called as I slowly lowered Peter to the ground, Shane continued talking " I won't have enough time to learn all your names so you'll be" he said pointing at Zoe "Red One, Red two" he said pointing at Seth, "Red three" Lulu, "red Four" Peter, "Red Baby" Tyler.

He then turned to me "You'll be red leader". I opened my mouth to say something but froze at the look his piercing brown eyes were giving me.

"Is everybody clear on that?" Shane asked. There were mumble going around of 'yes' and 'mhmm'.

"I said are we clear?" he asked again this time louder and stricter.

"Yes, god we sadi it already" Zoe snapped. Shane sent her an irritated look "We'll have to work on that, you're dismissed" While all my siblings headed back I turned to Shane when my sisters voice cut through the air.

"We're not military so don't treat us like that!" Shane sent her another irritated look and was about to respond, "Look Zoe just quit it, lets just go inside it's gonna be a long two days" I said but whispered the last part so only Shane and I could hear it. I heard him chuckle, when I heard that I grinned in response.

"I'll show you around now Shane, if that's okay" I told him still smiling. "Yeah, I'd like that" He said returning my smile.

"You know Alex how mom said dad would be proud of all of us?" Zoe asked. She waited for my response. I didn't turn around, I didn't say anything though I heard Lulu whimper and Seth try to shush Zoe telling her to quit it.

I waited for the blow to hit, any sign that I'd been smiling a minute ago was gone.

"Well he wouldn't be of you, in fact I doubt he ever was, but god if he saw you now I'm sure he's just be sick at the sight of what you've become" Zoe spat in contempt.

It was worse then a slap in the face and trust me she'd given me those. I stood still everything was silent all eyes on the two of us.

"What I've become?" I spat, I spun around "What I've become?!?!" I now yelled in disbelief "If you think _dad_ would be _sick_ at the sight of me…" I softened my voice and looked at my younger sister "then what would he think of you?"

My sister had tears in her light blue eyes , her mouth was open in disbelief. I had won that argument, yes. But what about the next one to come, I knew it wouldn't be over, it'd never be. I brushed past my sister into the house, the rest of the family following me in.

"I'm gonna show Shane around the house, then Emma's coming over, if you need anything just call…I guess". Zoe walked past me and shoved Tyler into my arms.

"Just stay the hell away from me" She muttered darkly.

"Zoe!" I called, regret filling me up like a water balloon. She flipped me off before running up the stairs blonde hair flowing behind her. I leaned against the wall running my free hand through my hair. I looked down at Tyler and smiled sweetly at him. I looked up and immediately was greeted with the sight of Shane's overbearing presence.

"Sorry about that, my sister and I don't really get along anymore, I'm sorry you had to see that." I stated my face flushing red with embarrassment.

"Don't worry, she started it, you had every right to defend your self" He replied. I wasn't sure if he was trying to comfort me, but he was not doing a very good job at it.

"Yea, but I'm the oldest, I shouldn't have done that, I should have more self control, should've just walked away"

"Don't be so hard on yourself," He stated placing a comforting hand on my shoulder. "You're only 18, you can't be good at everything" Gently he squeezed my shoulder and I gave him a light smile.

"I wish I could be, it'd make it so much easier." I told him. We looked at each other when I thought back to the first time I really had to take responsibility for my family.

*****************************FLASHBACK****************************

It was a Monday night, my mom was still at work as usual, Tyler and Peter were crying and Lulu, Seth and Zoe were complaining that they were hungry.

"Alex!! Alex, I'm hungry" Lulu whined tugging on my shirt.

"Lulu, I know, mom will be home soon" I told her giving her a reassuring smile, while I tried to calm Peter and Tyler down by singing softly to them.

I looked at the clock ½ and hour later to see it was 7:00 now. I sighed and shoved my project away that way due the next day. I picked up Tyler and took Peters hand and walked into the kitchen with them. I put them in the playpen as I started cooking dinner and preparing Tyler's baby food.

"Dinner" I called up 20 minutes later, at that moment feeling very much like a mother calling to her own children.

"Mom's home!!" Lulu exclaimed excitedly, Seth, Lulu and Zoe rushed down the stairs eager to see mom but froze when they only saw me setting the table.

"Alex, where's mom?" Zoe asked me in a nervous voice.

"Is everything okay?" Seth asked seconding Zoe's concern for where mom was. Lulu looked at me fearfully her large green eyes starting to brim with tears.

Eager to put my family at ease, though I myself was not sure as to what was going on I told them mom was just working late at the office and wouldn't be home until late. Everyone seemed content with that answer so they sat themselves down and started to eat.

That night I'd made soup and spaghetti. "Mhhh, this is really good Alex" Seth complimented. I gave him a grateful smile.

After dinner was over I looked at the huge mess my family had made that I would have to clean up. I had to tuck everyone into bed, and I remember vaguely Seth asking me for help on his math homework and Lulu with her spelling. I sighed, physically and emotionally drained!

Mom didn't come home that night until 1 in the morning and I had none of my project done. I'd been sitting in the kitchen for about 20 minutes when she stumbled through the door, looking clearly fatigues. She saw me "Alex…I'm so sorry."

"Just call next time, I don't want to be the one to tell them everything is going to be okay when I don't even have a fucking clue what's going on!" I said a bit to harshly.

I took a deep breath, "Sorr…" but se cut me off "No Alex you have every right to be angry and I'll be sure to call if it happens again."

"Thanks" I replied, "Thank you" mom said as she came and gave me a great hug, which I returned stiffly.

I could tell she was crying, "I don't know what I'd do with out you" she held me for one moment longer before releasing me.

I headed upstairs not knowing that I would have to do this man more nights then I ever expected or wanted.

*************************ENDFLASHBACK************************

I was dragged back to reality when Seth asked what to do with Peter.

"Uhhh " I said still slightly disorientated "I dunno, do whatever just leave him in the playroom Lulu you'll play with him won't you?" I asked giving her a motherly look. She nodded a grumpy look on her round face. "Thanks" I said in a small voice.

"Seth, would you be a peach and take Tyler and put him in his crib?" I questioned.

"Yea sure, do you need anything else your majesty?" Seth joke. I grinned wolfishly "How about you treat yourself to some commonsense I really think it'd help us all out." I winked at him and he smiled at me before taking Tyler from my arms.

I was able to show Shane around in approximately 10 minutes, showing him where everything was in the kitchen and all our room. I pointed out my room, which would be right across the hall from his.

"Well thanks Red lead…" I cut him off "Please Mr. Wolfe, call me Alex, I think you already know I won't respond to 'Red Leader'.

He looked at me sharply before giving me a slight nod. "I'm going to set up the perimeter"

I gave him a half-hearted smile before heading to my room.

**So what do you think? Was it believable? Or is Zoe too over the top? Next chapter Emma comes over and there is SERIOUS major sexual tension!! :D are you all excited yet? Hope y'all enjoyed!**

**Sincerely yours,**

**Germangirl678**


	5. Chapter 4

**CrissAngelmindfreak12-** yipee, thanks for the feedback!

**xLaurelCullenxx- **I know isn't she frustrating? is it to over the top or realistic enough to continue?

**h**

**Raine44354- **love the sn! :) me too

**Pirate-chan- **here it is, i hope you enjoy!

**Kali yugah-** :)

**foreverdeadwolfangel-** It true Zoe, is like that in my story but she may improve, just a little spoiler for ya ;) I love the name alex, I got the name from the port in Egypt-Alexandria, plus my middle name is Alexandra

**ABC Cullen- **yay! I'm soo happy you like it!

**SilentWatcher-** Good! I'm happy you're giving these T-rated stories a shot! :)

**Soul Of Doom-** Of course I will continue! I love to write and I'm enjoying writing this, especially with all the positive feedback!

**aandm20- **Great! Thank you so much for you're feedback, this gives me advice on my writing and it helps me make IT better :) I will try to tone down Zoe, Shane what I'm trying to get at is an immediate connection. Shane hasn't had that in a long time so I'm trying to make him kinda confused while still wanting to know more about it...does that make sense?

**Belle- **Here ya go~ :)

**Singing Soprano-** :) I'm excited too!

**BleedmetoINSANITY-** awww yay! I love you're enthusiasm! thank you :)

**creative-writing-girl13-** :)

**Evelyn Simms-** Yes, I like her too, that's of course why I'm writing her :) haha mhmmm I know i love that pairing, get ready for some intense action...not really but something :)

**Sidthe-** I hope interesting is good :) Haha, I know! I would have had Alex slap her but... I didn't want Alex to slap Zoe in front of Shane,and also Alex I think would feel too guilty if she slapped her.

**BitterBeginnings-** iloveyou :) 3

**StarlightRoses-** haha yes! I'm happy you're feeling that way! beware: more awkwardness to come :)

**smallncrazy91-** you've been my faithful reviewer! thank you sooo much :) It makes me happy!

**Disclaimer is on the first page also Lyrics belong to the Artist Evanescence, "Taking over Me".**

**Sorry for the delay, moved schools this year and I have school mon-sat along with tons of homework! :) But I hope you enjoy this chapter, is Zoe being realistic and are Shane and Alexs relationship and interactions realistic?**

**Chapter 4**

I sat on my bed silently looking at my photo album while waiting for Emma to arrive. My photo album started when I was in my moms stomach to a few weeks ago. While flipping mindlessly through the photos one caught my eye in particular I was around 5 years old, making my dad in his early 40's. We were lying on a couch, me snuggled up against his chest; we were looking at each other, my eyes were filled with such love and admiration in my eyes, and his with so much love it was heart breaking.

I sat there staring at the photo album speechless, I was overwhelmed with emotion, everything Zoe had said, the memories flooding in as I stared at the single photograph. I then felt sick to my stomach, I threw the album on the bed before leaving my room as quickly as possible, my palms were sweaty and the room felt as if it were spinning. I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply.

I heard a door open and a couple seconds later I heard my sisters voice which was sounded surprisingly concerned "Are you okay? I heard something...not that I care". My resolve weakened, the resolve in which to stay strong and be there for the family. Knowing that me trying to be there was making Zoe hate and resent me, I felt like breaking down and just have Zoe hold me for a few moments.

'NO!' I mentally scolded myself, 'I've come this far, they need me, I can't let them down'. I straightened up before stiffly saying "I'm fine".

"Fine, I was just trying to be nice!" Zoe snapped.

"Fine" I repeated calmly.

"Why are you always angry at me? I didn't do anything!" Zoe yelled angrily at me.

" I didn't do anything either, so why are you turning into a bitch just because you're still pissed about our argument from earlier, plus as I recall it's normally getting angry at me first" I growled. I was so frustrated, couldn't there be one day where Zoe and I didn't fight.

"I never start it, you always do! And you want a bitch, you haven't seen anything yet" Zoe said viciously taking a step towards me.

"Don't push you're luck, Zoe" I said in a low voice.

"Really? And what are you going to do about it Alexandria, huh?" Zoe taunted, but she had a fierce look in her eyes.

We stood facing each other, so much tension between us the room felt like it could've exploded. I opened my mouth about to retort when I heard my best friend Emma yell up the stairs "Hey Alex are you and Zoe arguing again?"

When everyone heard Emma's voice, a few things happened at once, first a huge grin crossed my face as I turned away from Zoe to face where my best friend would come up the stairs. Next Lulu and Peter emerged from their rooms screaming at the top of their lungs running to attack Emma with hugs.

"Hey guys" Emma stated finally reaching the top of the stairs, Lulu and Peter immediately threw themselves are Emma, Zoe muttered "freak" before going back into her room to talk to her boyfriend probably. As I saw Emma my whole world seemed to brighten. There she was, my best friend since 5th grade, she was pretty short around 5'3", she had shoulder length black hair with baby blue eyes. After she was bombarded with hugs (even from Seth!), I walked up to her before I picked her up and swung her around a fit of giggles escaping my lips. I was so happy to see her after all this craziness that seemed to happen in the matter of a couple hours.

"How are you?" Emma asked a grin on her face.

"Haha, funny you should ask, how are you?" I responded not in the mood to discuss my day at the moment.

"Pretty good, kinda dreading school on monday but you know" Emma joked, I burst out laughing "Already dreading monday? It's our 3-day weekend, we should try to enjoy it and not think about...school" I responded.

Emma and I had quite a few things in common the main ones being our love for music, being able to be ourselves no matter what, and our particular dislike for our high school. Don't get me wrong, Emma and I did well in school and enjoyed it but the people there, we could do without most of them.

At school we were the outsiders, the one's that stuck out like a sore thumb, not following what was in, not caring what people thought. My nasty temper and sometimes violent tendencies never really helped to much either. Emma being my other half was my exact opposite, she was out-going and bubbly but she was very real and could never go along with messed up version of society at our high school. We had other friends but we mainly stuck to ourselves. When my dad died, she was by my side constantly skipping classes with me if I need to go to the grocery store to pick up food, or run errands to ensure Lulu and Peter got home, or picking up and dropping Tyler at his different daycares. Emma was always there.

"Want to record another song?" Emma asked.

" Of course!" I exclaimed grinning. When we both discovered each others passion for music, I found out Emma was a skilled pianist and guitarist and as Emma always says my voice is a mix of Amy Lee's and Vanessa Carlton so this was the 2nd month we'd been working on covering some songs from Evanescence and our other favorite artists.

As we walked into my room, Emma saw the photo album lying on my bed and squeezed my shoulder, I shook her off before slamming the album shut and placing it under my bed.

Emma walked to the bench in front of the keyboard and started playing a few notes. "What do you want to record today?" she asked, I shrugged not really caring.

"How about Everybody's fool? I've already done the piano and guitar part, all you'd have to do is the voice..." she trailed off looking at me hoping I'd change my mind.

"No" I said quickly, I shook my head, I couldn't the lyrics reminded them to much of myself and I wasn't ready to admit that to myself.

Emma sighed "You're going to have to do it eventually if..." I cut her off "I know!". We paused and it was deathly silent, "...I know" I continued calmly, "...I can't do it, not yet" I said this in a slightly defeated tone.

Emma nodded her head before suggesting we do 'Taking Over Me', I agreed immediately before turning on my laptop and setting up the recording equipment. I grabbed the microphone testing to see it was on and working.

I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply while I let Emmas' piano into wash over me, drown me in it. I heard the pre-recorded heavy guitar part come in and I bobbed my head to the music.

_You don't remember me, but I remember you_

_ I lie awake and try so hard not to think of you_

_ But who can decide what they dream, and dream I do_

_ I believe in you_

_ I'll give up everything just to find you_

_ I have to be with you_

_ To live, to breathe_

_ You're taking over me_

_ Have you forgotten all I know, and all we had_

_ You saw me mourning my love for you, and touched my hand_

_ I knew you loved me then_

When I sang, I belted it out and I put all my emotions, all my feelings and memories into what I sang letting it take over me when I sang.

_I look in the mirror and see your face_

_ If I look deep enough_

_ So many fears inside that are_

_ Just like you are taking over_

_ I believe in you_

_ I'll give up everything just to find you_

_ I have to be with you_

_ To live, to breathe_

_ You're taking over me_

At this moment it was just the piano and me, I felt so overpowered, lost in nothing and everything. I swayed my hips to the beat

_ I believe in you_

_ (I believe in you)_

_ I'll give up everything just to find you_

At this point I was leaning against the wall.

_I have to be with you_

My eyes were closed, my head thrown back and my breathing was starting to become heavier.

_To Live_

I was lost in the music, nothing else mattered, I was singing this, I was blind to everything else going on around me.

_To Breath_

Somewhere in the back of my mind I heard the door open but I didn't comprehend it, I was to lost in the music.

_You're taking Over Me_

My body convulsed forward, nothing else mattered except the words I was singing and the feelings and memories they evoked.

_You're taking over me_

I was staring at the ceiling, all the emotions and pain I'd been feeling due to my dad and Zoey was gone in this moment, instead the pain was a dull buzzing in the back of my mind. I finished singing before slumping against the wall breathing heavily as I tried to control the raging emotions that flooded back.

I opened my eyes and turned my head only to see Shane standing there staring at Emma and I with a look of confusion and lust? As I regained control of my breathing an awkward silence fell throughout the room as the three of us stared at each other.

"What are you doing here?" I asked incredulously as I walked towards him, chest heaving slightly. Shane's eyes flicked down for a seconds before surveying the personal scene he'd just intruded on.

"I heard a noise so I came to investigate it" he stated in a voice that just screamed 'Now that I'm in charge I own this place'.

My blood boiled slightly and asked in a demanding tone giving him a look of disbelief " So every time you hear a noise you're going to investigate?".

He returned my look with a slight scowl gracing his handsome features " Look princess, it's my job to keep you safe and if I need to investigate every noise I hear to ensure that you stay safe that's exactly what I will do" he informed my in his deep rumbling voice, I open my mouth to protest but he cut me off. "... it's good I came up here anyways because you should always inform me if you're going to have someone come over to this house." He said pointing at Emma.

"That's Emma, my friend...I discussed this with you and my mom earlier about her coming over..." I shook my head thinking about how pointless this was getting. I walked over to where Shane was before giving him a slight push while I said "Can you go now?"

Apparently this was not the way to go about asking Shane to leave my room because before I knew what was happening by back was up against the wall and my arms were pinned above my head with Shanes face being mere inches from my own. I could feel heat radiating from his body and it made my stomach churn, but not in a bad way. His warm breath was lightly caressing my face as his dark chocolate eyes were glaring down into my forest green ones.

"Don't do that again" he demanded in a rough and almost deadly tone, but to me his voice sounded slightly dangerous, husky, seductive... At that moment I realized just how close my new protecter was to me and I felt my heart beat faster.

I looked at him now with a shy expression on my face and I let myself get lost in his eyes. His eyes began to change from the dark almost black brown to a lighter brown with golden specks in them. Never before had I ever seen eyes as beautiful as those " Sorry" I whispered in a husky voice which I'd never ever used before in my life. I was shocked by the tone in my voice but didn't have time to contemplate it as Shane responded.

"It's okay" he whispered back, his voice tantalizingly low and rough.

I couldn't help the set of shivers that ran up my spine after hearing his voice. He looked down at me a feral grin on his perfect, pink lips. His hands went from an almost painful grip on my wrists to a softer one as his hands gently caressed my arms.

**CLASH**

"Seth I'm GONNA KILL YOU!" we heard Zoe scream in the background. Immediately Shane recoiled from me as if I'd burned him. He glanced at me quickly before running out of the room to go investigate.

"Why did you hang up on my boyfriend on that?" Zoey shrieked at Seth.

"Why Wouldn't I? He's a JERK!" Seth yelled back at Zoe, the yells were muffled as Shane shut my door and had successfully left the room.

I stood there leaning against the wall frozen in place as I tried to dismiss what had just happened. I waited there feeling slightly dazed his masculine scent lingering where he was seconds ago, my senses on high alert. When I glanced to my left Emma was standing there mouth agape which soon transformed into a HUGE GRIN.

"Oh my god...Oh My God, OH MY GOD ALEX!" Emma squealed. I looked at her trying to play as if nothing had happened.

"Alexandria Natasha Plumber, don't you dare play dumb with me!" Emma screeched.

I let a small smile grace my lips and I then turned to face Emma who began freaking out "Okay, Alex want to explain why you have have a sexy older man living at your house but more importantly why didn't you tell me he was into you?"

I laughed when Emma said this before joining her on the bed offering her an explanation "Well, the military wanted to send someone to baby sit for us when my mom was gone and he is not into me, I just met him like 4 hours ago!". Emma snorted at the last bit "Not into you? So him having you pinned up against the wall looking at you like he wanted to fuck you right there is him not being into you?" she burst into a fit of giggles as I shushed her telling her Shane could probably hear her.

"It's nothing and keep your voice down, you know how thin these walls are!" I reprimanded but I couldn't help the playful grin that creeped onto my face.

"I don't care if he hears what I say..." She said indifferently "Infact..." a impish grin appeared on Emmas' face and I immediately knew what Emma was about to do.

"No, no, no, NO EMMA!" I screamed trying to drown out what she was about to yell, but her voice could be hear distinctly over mine as she yelled " ALEX'S SEXY BODYGUARD WANT TO FUCK H...". At that moment I pounced on her covering her mouth and effectively knocking us to the floor where we playfully wrestled for a couple minutes before giving up and lay on the floor giggling about what had just happened. I couldn't help but smile, I loved being with my best friend she always knew how to make me feel better, we talked for an hour about everything.

Somewhere in our conversation we circled back to Shane and all the sexual tension dying to explode between us...according to Emma.

"You know, he's like a predator and you're..." she licked her lips and raised her eyebrows "...his prey" she said in a husky voice. Emma continued with her charade by panting " Ohh...yess, Shane you're an Animal!" we both burst into a fit of giggles.

At that moment however the door burst open and a rather distressed looking Shane walked into the room. We all froze once again, my face flushed and I've never seen Emma look so embarrassed before, Shane glanced at us before pointing at Emma.

"Uh... You" he paused dropping his hand, "Me?" Emma said in a curious voice.

"Emma?" I offered helpfully.

"Yes!" Shane said his face brightening a bit " Yes, Emma your mother just called and said she's going to be here in the next ten minutes." We nodded our heads in understanding and after glancing over the room with calculating eyes Shane left my room.

As soon as the door closed I exploded into a fit of uncontrollable laughter while Emma glared at my furiously. She gave me a small shove which only made me laugh harder.

"You...you...you said.. and he...came..." I managed to gasp out before giving up and laughing so hard my tummy started to hurt. Emma joined my maniac-like laughter part way through and by the time Lulu came up to inform us that Emmas mother had arrived both Emma and I were both lying on my floor clutching out stomachs.

Emma and I walked downstairs giggling slightly as Shane came into sight. "Damn and he has a cute butt" Emma whispered to me nudging me slightly. My only response was to give her a slight push before I shook my head in agreement.

"I'll see you on monday" I told Emma before giving her a huge bear hug. "Behave yourself missy" She whisper in my ear as she pulled away, jokingly I responded "Oh I'll try my hardest but I might have some difficulty resisting". We grinned at each other before she left hoping in the car with her mom.

I turned around and was surprised to see my family and Shane facing me.

"What's for dinner?" Lulu asked and a feeling of dread wash over me as I realized the night had only just begun.

**Any reviews would be helpful, I know Shane has acted impulsively and he'll continue to do so, so I'm sorry if that's not super realistic, I'm trying my hardest if that means anything! I really hope you guys enjoyed and I'm sorry it's taken me about two years to update there's no excuse for that! Hope you enjoy :) **

**Preview for next Chapter: **

"_I am sorry..." he said looking at me seriously his hot touch on my arms made butterflies explode in my stomach as I raised my eyes to meet his._

_ "Sorry" Seth said "It's just the looks he was giving you..." his eyebrows furrowed together "...I'm just looking out for you, I don't trust him, he seems like an ass"_

_ "Something you want?" He asked walking towards me. I felt my body temperature spike as I watched his muscles bunch together and flex and I almost whimpered...almost._


End file.
